Hi. You're ugly.

the 97th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E17: ENNIO MORRICONE TRIBUTE EXPERIENCE

In the lead-up to the 100th Experience I notice that I've only ever looked back on one semester (season of Experiences). Ergo I've decided to look back on my whole blogging experience and present THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY, 2009-2011.

• MUSIC VIDEOS
• Good: Gumball Machine Weekend - Yppah (2009)
• Bad: Friday - Rebecca Black (2011)
• Ugly: A Cold Freezin' Night - The Books (2010)
• POLITICS
• Good: Obama announces Osama's death (2011)
• Bad: Osama is killed (2011)
• Ugly: Kevin Rudd's back hurts Julia Gillard's knife (2010)
• MEMES
• Good: Insane Clown Posse - "Fuckin' magnets, how do they work?" (2010)
• Bad: Kanye West - "Yo, I'm real happy for you, and I'mma let you finish, but I started the best meme of all time! OF ALL TIME!" (2009)
• Ugly: Susan Boyle (2009)
• VIDEO GAMES
• Good: Wii Sports Resort (2009) (oh come on it's not that bad)
• Bad: Super Mario Galaxy 2 (2010) (I give the game 7/10 but Nintendo 3/10)
• Ugly: Kinect (2010) (trying too hard to jump on the family game bandwagon)
• EVENTS IN MY LIFE
• Good: October 23, 2010
• Bad: October 14, 2010
• Ugly: November 12, 2010
• SPORTING EVENTS
• Good: Spain winning the World Cup (2010)
• Bad: Australia losing the Ashes (twice) (2009-2011)
• Ugly: any given scrap within the AFL, NRL or in the Australian synchronised swimming team (2009-2011)
• SUBJECTS AT UNI
• Good: MAT1CNS (2009)
• Bad: STA1SS (2009)
• Ugly: CSE1CPP (2009)
• COLLEGE EVENTS
• Good: Scribble Party (2009/10)
• Bad: pub crawl City Tour (2010)
• Ugly: none
• CJ CURRY EXPERIENCES
• Good: take your pick
• Bad: take your pick
• Ugly: Episode 97 (2011)
• WEATHER EVENTS
• Good: La Niña (2011)
• Bad: Japanese earthquakes (2011)
• Ugly: Black Saturday (2009)
• PEOPLE
• Good: Santa Claus (2009-2011)
• Bad: you (2009-2011)
• Ugly: me (2009-2011)

My plans: ep. 98 will be a look back at postage stamps from 2009-2011 (bad), ep. 99 will be a critical review of the latest gaming console (good) and ep. 100 will be just plain ugly. Also, look out for an E3 post. Probably ep. 99.

And now I shall retire for the day. I've already taken up all of your ugly-time for the day. Excuse me.

join the experience again soon...

What is this? I don't even...

the 96th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E16: AREN'T YOU A LITTLE SHORT FOR CJ?

Tell me to stop, before I get to the mega-epic-100th episode special.

Today I have played Pachinko with a Diamondback, some Camels, and a Nightstalker. I had The Vision to Shout "We Will Survive" and dodge a Pistolwhip, and regained my Composure with a Fire Wire cable. I'm kinda Over Emotion, so if you ask me to Feel The Drums, I Can Only Disappoint You. I also discovered that you have a Fixation on Flesh. I also met a drugged-up alien - a.k.a. a Spaced Invader - who thinks that this is a Strange World. Yay!

i got what you want, boy

I am not blinded by your moxie. I am not impressed with your chutzpah. I am not amazed by your use of different and unusual words. You're not a nice person. Neither am I. But I suppose you're nicer than I am. In a sense.

I have been asked if I'd consider making FORTRAN and C my bitches. Given the hideous failure to make C++ my bitch and the hideous success making Java my bitch, I think I'll pass and wait until I can find a decent C# book. Also, while I'm at it, buy my book. And speaking of which, the CJ Curry Experience is still taking donations for interesting parties... I mean, from interested parties. Send the donations in the usual way: put the cash (no money orders or cheques) in a padded envelope, addressed to fe80::e916:43e8:230b:3dc5 (or, if you prefer, 2002:83ac:507e:f:e916:43e8:230b:3dc5). Throw it into the sun, and watch the fireworks (they will rain down on my house automagically).

i got what you want

Brazil. It's a nice country. Also a nice song. But that's all I know about Brazil.

And now I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that there is no good news. The good news is that's all the bad news I have. (Also that there's pie afterwards.)

RIP phone. You were as much of a second-hand phone as I expected you to be. But I'm not mourning, as it is after noon. I enjoyed your company. Later, phone!

and you ain't gonna get it

My other project is slowly garnering more and more hits. Please be one of them. Bye!

join the experience again soon...

Who are your main tenants?

the 95th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E15: JUST BECAUSE I EAT FOOD, DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN DISCRIMINATE AGAINST ME!

It'd be just my luck, wouldn't it? I finally (after ten days) get around to writing another Experience and Blogger is down for maintenance. Means I also couldn't update this for a while. I was not a happy chappy yesterday. Now I'm a sick happy chappy. But on with the blog. Your mindless bullshit is all the same to me anyway.

I've written a lot of things you're currently wishing you hadn't read. But that was your fault and yours alone. UNTIL NOW! The CJ Curry Experience now comes with a free, once-in-a-lifetime offer that is free and guaranteed to be your favourite free thing in all of freedom. It's a MINDFUCK WARRANTY! I'm providing free mindfuck warranties: that is, I'll fully reimburse you for any mindfuck you have while you read this (normal value $4,993.52). This offer of a free mindfuck warranty will last until the end of this paragraph.

Owls. Everyone is fond of owls.

Cheds. Everyone is fond of Cheds.

Portal 2. Everyone is fond of Portal 2.

Politicians. Everyone is fond of hating politicians.

I have my reasons for wanting to stay invisible. Please respect these wishes. Because I'm kickass, but not *that* kickass. Yet. And I don't like being visible during these times. I'm sure you'll understand. ...wait, what? I'm not invisible? Damn. Oh well, OK then, I'm only partially, temporarily and sporadically pseudo-invisible. BUT I STILL HAVE RIGHTS.

There has been no zombiefication this month. I'm sad. But I soon will be my zombie self, according to the MZS organisers. Oo, zombies. And pretty soon we'll all know who's out and who's in and we'll be slurping vit C tablets through straws until we cry for mercy and beat ourselves over the heads with USB flash drives. Savvy?

Funny how my peak productivity always hits its peak at about 2am. I wrote most of this blog in ten minutes flat last night and now that it's not longer last night and it's this afternoon I'm lost for words. I better get them down PDQ because we're very busy in the world of CJ Curry. Also, I totally nearly wrote "busty" instead of "busy". Wouldn't that be a helluva sight, though? Busty CJ Curry. I blame it on the proximity of the T and Y keys. There's always a problem whenever I write something and it turns out two keys next to each other transform the whole word OH SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Also, cook for me. And halfadozen others. And you will be awesome. Because we are buying your ingredients and you are cooking. There has already been one winner. Cook whatever you want, except don't cook me. Also also if you're reading this blog then this sentence is a non-sequitur.

Bottle of water. Bottle of water. Bottle of water. COOL.

Speaking of cool, it's time to take my car out for a wash, spin and rinse. Wagner's rinse cycle should suffice. Suffer ice? Maybe...

join the experience again soon...

I looked at your bandannas, and thought of you.

the 94th experience has begun...

CJ CURRY S05 E14: TASMANIA CURRY! PART DEUX!

...sox bigger than a bread box I told my pink volcano, who was wearing my two-litre, five-speed octopus... WHAT? Oh yeah. Good. Time for me to stop stealing content and try writing my own.

I'm sitting here pondering my recent trip to Tasmanialand over a slice of chocolate pie. Nom. And I promised a report on the beautiful Mastania... so here it is. It was beautiful. The end.

I suppose I'd better fire off a better report. I visited Hobart, Launceston, Devonport, and a few others. And I became a person in an interesting position of having visited Hobart, Perth and Melbourne all within eight hours. Challenge accepted? I'd like to see the west coast a little more next time, and Cradle Mountain (I like cradles. Especially the cat's cradle), but otherwise I did enjoy my international trip.

Best place: Cataract Gorge in Launceston. Loved the way it crosses nature with the city. Major tourist attraction much? Loved the beauty, loved the wonder, loved the walking tracks that I haven't yet been on. Good incentive to go back.

Also best place: Binalong Bay. I haven't seen snow that white since Snow White. ...or, rather, sand. I haven't seen sand that white since Cable Beach in Broome. Mind you, the white sand at Cable Beach swept me off my feet...

Also also best place: Salamanca Place's market. Small-time compared to the Queen Victoria Market, but still quaint and fun to shop for bargains. Found some souvenirs for my folks, as well as a poster for me that will stop me explaining to every single foreigner/non-cricket-fan that cricket is NOTHING LIKE BASEBALL.

Also also also best place: Monster Cookie Café. They do deep fried Mars Bars!

Also also also also best place: Queen's Head in Hobart. I loved the band they had: "Lively Up!" Obviously influenced by Bob Marley, they did reggae and funk and everything except Dreadlock Holiday. :( Didn't matter much, because I sang it afterwards to myself. I don't like cricket, oh no, I love it...

Also also also also also best place: Ross. It's a quaint little tourist trap, and I liked it. I went on the advice of Daddy Curry, and was advised to visit the bakery. Two bakeries in Ross, and I got the wrong one... Still, eh?

Also also also also also also best place: Exeter bakery. Again, a quaint little town. Not a tourist trap. And they served a nice spinach roll.

Also also also also also also also best place: home. There's no place like it, even if you're on holiday.

So what's my verdict? Compared to Victoria, Tasmania is greener, hillier, colder, smaller, and quainter. Or quirkier, whichever you prefer. It's not a different country, but it's different country. Also, I found no two-headed people. Maybe they were hiding...

join the experience again soon...